Jealousy
It was an odd conversation about another Christian leader, who had just been promoted to a position of national leadership. A fellow minister was raising some concerns about this man’s suitability for the position, but had no specific, tangible evidence for his hesitation: ‘I’m not sure what it is about him,’ he mused. ‘It’s just, when he stands up to speak, although his preaching is fine, there’s just something… I can’t put my finger on it… something that’s not quite right about him. It’s a strong feeling that I have. I think there’s a skeleton in that cupboard.’ And then, to endorse his unspecified suspicion, the minister added, ‘And I’m not the only one who feels this way. There are a number of people around the country who believe the same thing. Something is going to emerge, I’m sure of it.’
Brilliant. The newly-promoted leader’s character had been smeared, and all on the basis of a vague feeling. There was no evidence of anything being wrong, but suspicion had been raised – and passed around – simply because of a hunch. And for all I know, that hunch might been created by jealousy.
As we read that the Jewish reaction to Paul’s ministry in Thessaloniki was fuelled by jealousy - perhaps they were envious at the amazing response that he was receiving as he preached the good news - we should guard our own hearts. Jealousy can eat us alive: as Proverbs puts it, ‘A peaceful heart gives life to the body. But jealousy rots the bones’ (Proverbs 14:30).
Modern psychologists agree with the ancient diagnosis!
‘When we think about jealousy, we often think about love and relationships. But this emotion can have an even broader impact on different areas of our lives. It also has powerful effects on our mental health, leading to anxiety, insecurity, and low self-esteem.This emotion can significantly affect your mental health. In terms of relationships, jealous feelings can lead to anxiety due to worry or suspicion. It may cause people to doubt themselves and their partners, leading to insecurity and a lack of trust. Additionally, it can lead to emotional self-sabotage, or subconsciously engaging in behaviours that undermine feelings of security or confidence. It can also harm one’s self-esteem or belief in their abilities and value’ (mindfulhealthsolutions.com)
And jealousy bears terrible fruit:
‘But suppose your hearts are jealous and bitter. Suppose you are concerned only about getting ahead. Don’t brag about it. Don’t say no to the truth. Wisdom like that doesn’t come down from heaven. It belongs to the earth. It doesn’t come from the Holy Spirit. It comes from the devil. Are you jealous? Are you concerned only about getting ahead? Then your life will be a mess. You will be doing all kinds of evil things’ (James 3:14-16)
Frank Santora (biblestudytools.com) offers the following questions to enable us to consider if we are falling into the trap of jealousy:
- We believe we could have gone farther if we had gotten the same breaks as them
- We use excuses to explain why they succeeded while we failed
- We temper our compliments of others with faint praise
- We don’t congratulate a friend on their good fortune
- We question the motives of those who show kindness or are successful
- We gloat inwardly when someone gets caught, because “they had it coming to them”
- We can’t be genuine friends with someone who excels in our field
- We are happy to hear that some public figure got caught in sin
- We are better at criticism than praise
A prayer: Father, You alone know my heart. My thoughts and feelings are driven by so many mixed motives. Search me and show me where envy and jealousy may have taken root in me; where my perception of others has been distorted by my envious attitude towards them. Help me to celebrate when others do better than I; help me to learn what it means to be contented. I need Your help and power, loving Father. Amen.