Talk, and Listen
Then Jephthah sent messengers to the Ammonite king with the question: “What do you have against me that you have attacked my country?” (Judges 11:12)
Sometimes we people of faith are quick to talk, swift to make judgements, and slow to listen and discuss. Insisting that we are in the right, we don’t pause for breath and thought, and can dash in to conflict unnecessarily. A lot of tension could be avoided if we just give time to hear others, reflect on what they say, and be prepared to admit that we might be wrong. As we are told the details of Jephthah’s extensive attempts to negotiate reasonably with the Ammonites, we see that he didn’t rush to military action. Only when it became clear that he was being totally ignored did he muster the troops.
Ironically, instead of humbling us to understand that we can so easily be mistaken, faith makes some people hardened in their certainty and sense of rightness. It gets even more complicated when they are convinced that God agrees with them: now negotiation becomes almost impossible.
Last night, at the end of a church meeting, a man took objection to something that had been said (not, on this occasion, by me). He had completely misunderstood the statement, and I carefully explained this to him. He looked crestfallen, as if disappointed that he had no case to argue, nothing to be offended or confrontational about. Reluctantly, he admitted that he had misheard, but went away looking very unhappy that he had been proven to be wrong, as if he relished the opportunity for conflict and complaint.
In a tense situation right now? Put that sword down, and talk. And more importantly, listen. It might prevent a lot of unnecessary pain for all concerned.